When a woman forgets her dignity, what should be a man's response toward her?
Sadly, millions of men see the "adult" industry as nothing more than opportunity to take from a woman everything she is willing to offer them. Such men dismisses their duty to love women, hiding their shameful habits behind a single petty excuse: "She's willing to do it."
But how does her inability to see her own dignity absolve a man from his responsibility to acknowledge it? In fact, at the very moment a woman loses sight of her value, what she needs most is someone who loves her enough to remind her of it. Take, for example, a friend of mine named Matt, who went to high school with a woman would later become a stripper. A few months after taking the job to pay off personal debt, she agreed to allow Matt to interview her. As you are about to read, her honesty and bluntness show how much damage is being caused to women in the industry, even if they are willing to endure it.
When asked what her job was like—being lusted after by men who care nothing of her—she answered:
“It makes me feel sick. A lot of the time I try to imagine they’re not there or something but part of it is making them feel special. Looking into their eyes is really important. I hate having to do that because I hate them all. I always have thoughts like ‘I hate you so much. Please die.’ . . . I only work on Saturdays. I’d hate to do it more than once a week. It’s mentally and physically exhausting. Having . . . to sit and talk to guys and act interested in their lives is the worst part. . . . When I work there, I buy so much alcohol to cope with it or even while I’m getting ready for work, I’ll have a bottle of vodka or rum in my room so I can cope with the night and a lot of money I earn goes on that. But I don’t even drink most of the time when I go out with my friends. Just Saturday nights when I know what I have to face. . . . The job has made me completely lose faith in love, marriage (yes, nearly all the regulars are married) and decent men. I’ve come to hate men so much. I’ve tried having a few relationships since I started this job and I just couldn’t feel anything for anyone anymore.”
When asked what she would say to men who visit strip clubs, she responded:
“You go there to get turned on or to be made to think that you’re special to these girls or that they want you. They don’t want you at all . . . . they resent you completely. And I can’t understand how a guy could get turned on by the fact that these girls are faking being interested in them. The girls don’t want you, they want your money. The girls act like they’re having fun but they’re not. They’re the best actresses in the world!!”[1]
Thankfully, she quit her job shortly after this interview. Please keep her, and all people in the "adult" industry in your prayers. In fact, why not pray a Hail Mary for her right now?
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[1]. http://www.whodoesithurt.com/guests/202-june-a-matt-fradd